Determination

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The Hunter.

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The Hunted.

IMG_1148Will our hero be able to mentally teleport himself through the glass to

catch his dastardly feathered foe?

IMG_1153Dun

IMG_1157Dun

IMG_1159DUNNN!!!!!!!

 

What I’ve done…I can’t really decide if it’s genius or torture.  However, I stuck a bird feeder outside one of my bedroom windows and I’ve placed a little box under the window for Oliver to watch the birds eat….while dreaming of eating them.  I guess.

He really seems to enjoy it.  Seriously, he will sometimes spend a couple of hours sitting at this window, depending on how much action is happening out there.  Nothing, and I do mean nothing, else gets his attention like that.  My fickle little fella.

But he sits and he stares his death rays through the window and he flicks his tail around like he’s swatting at flies.  (How southern did I just sound right there??  “Swatting at flies”…Southern and 74 years old too.  Hotness.)

I had his front claws removed when he was young so this is about as close as he’ll ever get to catching any bird.  Bless his little heart.  But he seems to love it.

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Look how straight he sits.

 

Shhh…He’s huntin’ buurrds….

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Model Remodel

I bought my house ( or started buying my house) 8 years ago when I was 26.  It is a small-ish  (less than 1300 square feet) 3 bedroom, 1 bath fixer upper.  And with all the naivety of a 26-year-old first time home buyer, I walked into this new adventure thinking first of all that I had miraculously become rich as I slept that night, and secondly that I’d have a bathroom and a kitchen remodeled within the first 3 months tops.  I’d also have a gorgeously landscaped lawn.

Here’s a grainy picture of me in front of my house the day I bought it.

1st day with house

Needless to say, the next day there was no remodeling going on.  The next year….no remodeling.  Strangely enough I hadn’t become rich overnight and there were these things called “bills” I was required to pay.  Funny how that happens.

So for the last 8 years this is the bathroom I walk into daily.

bathroom

Blue marble wall board.  It’s basically paneling made to look like marble.  Blue.  Marble.  People in the 70’s were about as delusional as I was when I got this house.

And this is my lovely matching bathtub.

IMG_1120Right.  I was too embarrassed to show a close-up of the faucet and other hardware, but it’s somewhere around 30 – 40 years old so you can close your eyes and imagine that nastiness.  You are, however, able to see the shower head that is detaching from the wall in its best attempt to end this miserable life.

Well last weekend – 8 years later! – I finally got that awful tub replaced!!  Hallelujah!!!!!!!

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I was so happy I took a picture of the missing tub….

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…as well as its ‘remains’ at my curb awaiting trash pick-up day.  RIP Ol’ Blue.

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Ta daaaaaa!!  This is my new, improved shower area.  Love, love, love it!!

Unfortunately the lovely blue marble wall board is still in place.  It is my next target.  *insert evil laugh here*

Saturday Mornings with Oliver

Oliver has a couple of rituals he likes to perform on a daily basis.  For example, he knocks my computer mouse off the desk every. single. day.  Nothing else that happens to be sitting on this table gets knocked off.  He just takes particular offense to the mouse.

A new thing he’s developed is our Saturday morning ritual.  Most other days of the week, like most people, I’m up and heading to work; but on the weekends I typically am able to leisurely rise and begin my day on my own schedule.  Or Oliver’s schedule.  Whatever.

Every Saturday morning – Saturdays only, mind you.  Not Sundays. – Oliver takes an interest in the cables on the side of my laptop, trying to make them his newest chew toy.  As a result, he and I spend at least 10 or 15 minutes every. Saturday. morning. having this interaction.

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“Oliver.  No.”

As his head ever so sslloowwllyy gravitates back to the cables…”Oliver.  Stop.”

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“Whatever!  This is exhausting!  I have to lay my head down way down here.”

Within seconds, “Oliver.  Don’t bite the cables!”

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“I’m so bored with these cables.  I don’t even like them anymore!  So unaffected.”

About 3 minutes later he switches sides like he wants to sit with me.  And I fall for it.

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“Ok!!!  I’m just gonna touch it with my head.”

“Oliver,”  you know that deep, you’re-about-to-get-it voice.

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“My nose!  I’m just touching it with my nose!”

Back to the other side.  “Oliver!  I said no!”

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“Ok fine.  My ear.  I just want to hear the motor whir.  I need to hear the whir!!!”

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“My paw.  I can’t bite with my paw.  I need to rest my paw right here.”

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“Oh my gosh!!!  My nose.  My nose again.”

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“Fine!  My other paw.  For real this time.  I’m good.”

After 15 minutes of this.

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“You ruin everything.”

Project Chick

You know how last week I was all I-never-complete-projects-because-I-procastinate-procrastinating?  Well this weekend it’s almost as if my body was on a mission to prove me a liar.  I’m practically a project queen now!!

So let’s get started.  Last week one of our local craft stores had daily sales to get us all ready for the impending Mother’s Day by putting certain items on sale, determined for every mother to receive a handmade foamy picture frame, or one of those handy clay ashtray/bazeeblebug thing-a-majiggys we all made as children.  Fortunately for me, that meant one day they put acrylic paints on sale and though I’ve never painted a picture on my own in. my. life. I decided I must make an attempt at becoming the next Rembrandt.  Alas, weekend project number one is born….

I looked online and found the following picture for my inspiration:

I thought it would look great in my living room after I paint and redecorate like I want.  Really though, I just wanted to give it a try and see what happened.  We have a local place that charges around $35 and basically gives you a 3-hour art class where they walk you through step-by-step how to paint a different painting each night.  It’s really a fun girls night out.  I’d highly recommend it.

I’ve gone twice and one day I will post the pictures on here of the monstrosities I produced and allow you to compare them to the originals.  I don’t know if my mental translation of the instructions or my distinct inability to follow direct orders is at fault, however, to look at my paintings you would think maybe they sat me in another room and forced me to listen to the instructions through a wall.  Or two.

Needless to say, I didn’t have high hopes for this instructions-free painting.  I mean, if I can’t follow instructions from an actual experienced painter, what could I possibly expect when I let myself loose with no supervision?  Well……here’s the result:

“Genius!”  Is that what you just screamed in your mind?  Me too, friend.  Me too.  I feel you.

*~*~

Ok, so my intent was for that to be my sole project for the weekend.  However, the excitement of painting genius apparently wears off pretty quickly and I was a little stir-crazy.  It was a rainy day so there were no outside activities to partake in, sadly.

My fella friend bought me one of those plant-in-a-pot deals about two weeks ago and it’s been sitting untouched on my counter ever since.  Every time I see it I feel guilty because the poor guy obviously doesn’t understand what a non-completer I am and he spent at least a couple of bucks on this.  It’s even worse when he’s at my house and I just know he’s seeing its incomplete, untouched resting place each time.  With this in mind, I decided I would surprise him on his next visit with a completely potted flower bulb!

Here’s what I started with:

About 30 minutes later – because I had to wait for the included soil block to expand – this is what it magically became:

This is my first attempt at growing a flower from a bulb, so we’ll see how this pans out.  Even Oliver seemed to be a little skeptical…

Oh, ye of little faith.

Ok so the plant thing is a little less impressive on the ‘genius’ scale.  (Oh.  You do remember my Rembrandt, don’t you?  I’m not much of a bragger, obviously.)  I did, however, have to find a way to compensate for the shortage of soil, so I pulled a dead gardenia out of its pot and transferred the necessary dirt.  Very MacGyver-esque.

The weekend rolls on around to Sunday and another of my spontaneous project purchases has been taunting me for weeks now.

Dun Dun duuuuuuuuuuuuuuun……

Another gift from my fella friend was a sewing kit at Christmas.  I’d expressed an interest in learning to sew and had even crafted a canvas log carrier for his Christmas gift.  Of course, since later December that sewing kit had found a permanent home in my crafty office/project room that never. gets. used. and was yet another of his gifts that taunted me with its lack of use.

So anyway, I bought myself a sewing machine thinking I’d make myself some curtains.  Sewing machine arrives.  I remove it from the box, do the minimal ‘assembly’ it required.  I pulled out the manual and went over all the parts.  I went to the local fabric store and bought some scrap fabrics for experimenting.  Then I proceeded to ‘pin’ a multitude of other sewing projects on my Pinterest board.  In the meantime, the sewing machine sat.  And sat.  And collected dust.  And sat some more.  As did that Christmas gift from my fella friend.

On Saturday I thought I’d try my hand at loading a bobbin, and threading the machine.  Neither of these things have I done since maybe high school Home Ec class.  I must say, I was pretty rock star.

Sunday I finally got brave.  I decided I had to start somewhere and I really wanted to be able to tell my fella friend I’d used that sewing kit and actually have something to show him.  *Drum roll please*

Ta daaaaaaaa!!!

I made my very own tissue holder!  A completely unnecessary item, I’m fully aware, but I made it and it’s mine!  All mine!

I did document the step-by-step process and am planning on posting to go through that process next for those of you who might be interested.  In the meantime, I’m a project chick now!

Project Complete! Let’s EAT!

I mentioned in my previous post, Random Kinda Weekend, a project I wanted to try.  Here is a snap of my inspiration:

Beautiful, aren’t they?  So I hopped on over to my local craft store and bought all the materials I would need to do my own version of EAT.  I got home and started on the first letter only to decide I didn’t really like the stencil I chose, so there it sat for an entire month taunting me with its incomplete-ness.

For those that don’t know, I’m a textbook non-completer.  I can get excited about any number of projects, buy the materials, and then leave them to collect dust for an indeterminable amount of time.  It’s almost like ‘non-complete’ is my actual hobby instead of all the little projects I pick up to try.

Skip forward an entire month and I finally decide I will complete those letters.  I have a new stencil and I’m ready to go.  So yesterday afternoon before girls night I sat down and I got to painting.

First up, a good solid coat:

Then, it’s stencil time!

And finally…the finished product!  *insert drum roll here*

The light pink doesn’t show up so well in this picture so here’s another that shows it a little better:

And that is the first completed project from the self-professed non-completer!

Random Kinda Weekend

Friday at work…Fun me: ‘Hmmm, I want to do something different this weekend.  Europe?’

Logical me: ‘That’s your first suggestion?  Europe?!?!  What lottery did you win today?  Idiot.’

Fun me:  ‘Oh yeah.  Right.  Chattanooga?  Aquarium?  Beach?’

Logical me: ‘Seriously.  4 or 5 hours one way.  What about that bathroom remodel you’ve been wanting to do?  What about the landscaping you want to get done?  New front door?  What about a savings account?  Ever thought of maybe saving up for one of those?’

Fun me:  ‘Wah wah waaaah.  Whatever.  Oooooh!!  Botanical Gardens!!  Only an hour away and free!  I can take lots of pictures of pretty flowers!  Yeah!  Botanical Gardens it is!’

Logical me:  ‘*sigh*  Fine.’

Saturday morning…Fun me:  ‘It’s Botanical Gardens Day!  Yippee!  Let’s go!’

Logical me:  ‘First of all, it’s 6 AMSimmer.  Secondly, since you’ve got some time you should probably do something productive first.’

Fun me:  ‘Oh!  I can paint some of my living room!  Good idea!’

6:15 – It’s the weekend.  Coffee!  Head into kitchen.

6:16 – Oh!  Gotta feed the dog.  And Oliver.  Don’t forget Oliver.

6:24 – Pets fed – check!  Now coffee!  Walk back into kitchen.

6:25 – I should probably study my bible some since it’s the weekend and I have the time.  Plus I have that new concordance and dictionary.  Yay!  I love new stuff!  Hmmm, what should I study?  Trust?  Anger?  Faith?  Probably trust.

6:28 – Bible, concordance, dictionary gathered on kitchen table.  Sit down.  Ooh!  Coffee!!

6:30 – Coffee made in my new giant coffee mug that I love.  Back to the kitchen table.  Look at the books.  I don’t know where to start.  I should probably decide what all I want to do today first.  Well, botanical gardens.  And painting.  Ok, study my bible.  Paint that one wall in the living room.  Get ready.  Botanical Gardens.  Then I should really do some crafty project from Pinterest.  I really want to make that wreath.  Mental Image:

6:34 – That thing is so stinking cute!  And probably really simple.  I can make that for sure.

6:35 – Crack open the dictionary.  Oh my.  There’s a lot going on in here.  How do I….where do…Concordance.  Start with the concordance.

6:39 – Put dictionary aside.  Open concordance.  Trust….  Flip to ‘Trust’.  Oh.  There’s a lot of verses listed.  234?  I mean…  Flip through the pages randomly while my mind is blown.  Oh look!  There’s different stuff in the back!

6:48 – After flipping through all the ‘extra stuff in the back’.  I haven’t done any studying yet.  I just really don’t know what to do with this stuff.  Well, I can at least read that last chapter in James…

6:49 – Gah.  I’m just gonna go ahead and paint.

6:57 – Paint equipment gathered. Well, I should probably get caught up on Draw Something.  I’ll just do that really quick.

7:23 – That took longer than I expected.  Hilary’s gonna love that arcade drawing.  Heeheeehahaaaa!  Painting.  Now.

7:46 – Pulled everything away from the wall.  Swept, cleaned behind loveseat.  Plastic down to cover floor.  Now it’s time to paint.  I haven’t checked Facebook yet today.  Or my email.  I’ll just do that really quick.

8:52 – Oh my gosh!  It’s almost 9!  Get. Off. Pinterest!  You’re gonna waste the whole day if you don’t get up and get started!  You always do this!!!

9:45 – Most of the edging is done.  Now I have to remove the screws from the curtain rod brackets.  Of 6 screws, about 4 of them are stripped out.  Screwdriver…nope.  Rubber band between screwdriver and screw….Pinterest is a dirty liar.  No pliers, what about wire cutters?  Meh.  Ok, butter knife.

10:21 – With random variations of screwdriver, wire cutters, butter knife, and fingers all the screws and brackets are finally removed.

11:08 – First coat of painting – check!  Rest time!

1:02 – Dishwasher loaded, shower, dressed, and now heading up to the Botanical Gardens!!  Yay!  I bet the flowers are gonna be so pretty! I could maybe even go by Old Time Pottery or Whole Foods.  What about that used book store?  I love books!

1:24 – Stop and pick up a little snack.  Get gas.  *Impromptu Christina Perri concert in my car*

1:43 – Almost there!  Yay!  Wait…what’s that billboard?  Giraffe encounter?  At the zoo?  Aw!  I love the zoo!  I could go there instead.  Birmingham Zoo, here I come!

Some of my fav pictures:

They have this ‘aviary’ thing you can walk in and feed these birds nectar.  It’s so fun!!!!

They have two new elephants and have completely revamped their area.  I was so happy about this!  The elephants were playing and having a grand old time.  I probably stood and watched them for 20 or 30 minutes.

See?!?!  How cute is that?!?!?!

Ok, I don’t know about anyone else but if I’m taking a picture and I get direct eye contact from one of the animals….it’s like we share a moment.  I do realize she’s probably thinking it may be lunch time and the short chick with the camera looks like a good start, but stick with me here.  I barely resist the urge to bounce up and down and squeal like a 4-year-old in excitement.  Yes, I am 33 years old.

4:52 – Closing the zoo down.  I must go.

5:20 – Heading back home.  Eh…I don’t think I’ll go to Old Time Pottery or anywhere.  I’m gonna go to Hobby Lobby because I need some shelves and I want to get the stuff for that wreath too.

6:04 – Arrive at Hobby Lobby.  No shelves.  No wreaths.  No yarn for the wreath.  No flowers for the wreath.  Fail to the 4th power.  Oh!  What about those kitchen letters!  Mental image:

6:06 – Found the wooden letters section.  Ok.  E…..A……Oh no.  No ‘T’?  Booooooooo!

6:32 – I’ve wandered around the rest of Hobby Lobby.  Checked out fabrics (because I’ve decided I’ll be making my own curtains), roamed all the knick knacks.  I bet Michael’s will have what I’m looking for.

7:13 – Searched Michael’s.  Found a wreath.  No yarn, no flowers.  Fail.  But I was able to find all three letters and some paint.  Yeehaw.  At least one project.  Now I can head home happy.

Sunday…TV, Facebook, TV, Spider Solitaire.  I could put the second coat of paint on.  TV, Facebook, Pinterest, TV, Spider Solitaire.  I still need to paint those letters.  I’m so excited about the project!  Pinterest, TV.  Game of Thrones marathon (aka TV).  I could read some of my magazines!!

Ok, seriously.  I used to subscribe to 2 or 3 magazines.  Like a year or two ago.  But there came a time when I stopped reading them and they started collecting.  And collecting.  And collecting.  Then the subscriptions ran out but the stack of magazines ‘to be read’ stayed.  Untouched.  A year or two, did I say?  I went through a couple of them yesterday.  When were they from?  2008!  I only wish I were kidding.

I wormed my way through several episodes of Game of Thrones, along with a mixture of internet (Pinterest, Facebook) and Spider Solitaire until about 6 when I decided I’d finally get to those letters.  (For the record, there was also some cleaning mixed in there sporadically.  Dishwasher here, bathroom there, laundry.  I wasn’t completely useless.)  By bed time I managed to complete one letter and now I’ve decided I don’t like the stencil I used so it’s gonna be back to the drawing board on that.  Pictures will be provided at a later date – when I finally get them finished.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is my weekend in a glance.

I’m a World Changer!

This is all I’m saying.  I wrote this just 9 short months ago:

J. K. Rowling, we have a problem.

And I went on Amazon.com just this morning to see this bit of news:

Harry Potter on Kindle

Yes, Yes, and another YES!!!!  I can read them now!

Much thanks to Ms. J. K. Rowling for listening to me.  (I’m sure it was me and only me.)

If anyone has some issue they need resolved, just let me know and I’ll fit you in.  Obviously my direct line is working now.

Hallelu-yer!!!