Saturday Mornings with Oliver

Oliver has a couple of rituals he likes to perform on a daily basis.  For example, he knocks my computer mouse off the desk every. single. day.  Nothing else that happens to be sitting on this table gets knocked off.  He just takes particular offense to the mouse.

A new thing he’s developed is our Saturday morning ritual.  Most other days of the week, like most people, I’m up and heading to work; but on the weekends I typically am able to leisurely rise and begin my day on my own schedule.  Or Oliver’s schedule.  Whatever.

Every Saturday morning – Saturdays only, mind you.  Not Sundays. – Oliver takes an interest in the cables on the side of my laptop, trying to make them his newest chew toy.  As a result, he and I spend at least 10 or 15 minutes every. Saturday. morning. having this interaction.


“Oliver.  No.”

As his head ever so sslloowwllyy gravitates back to the cables…”Oliver.  Stop.”


“Whatever!  This is exhausting!  I have to lay my head down way down here.”

Within seconds, “Oliver.  Don’t bite the cables!”


“I’m so bored with these cables.  I don’t even like them anymore!  So unaffected.”

About 3 minutes later he switches sides like he wants to sit with me.  And I fall for it.


“Ok!!!  I’m just gonna touch it with my head.”

“Oliver,”  you know that deep, you’re-about-to-get-it voice.


“My nose!  I’m just touching it with my nose!”

Back to the other side.  “Oliver!  I said no!”


“Ok fine.  My ear.  I just want to hear the motor whir.  I need to hear the whir!!!”


“My paw.  I can’t bite with my paw.  I need to rest my paw right here.”


“Oh my gosh!!!  My nose.  My nose again.”


“Fine!  My other paw.  For real this time.  I’m good.”

After 15 minutes of this.


“You ruin everything.”